Reviews from

Perennials of War

Viewing comments for Chapter 16 "Chapter Funf part vier"
Is Anderson a gallant knight? Can he recover Shan

36 total reviews 
Comment from Zue65
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I will continue following this post. The heat and tension is mounting which makes the story more interesting. The readers will surely wait for the next exciting events. Thanks for sharing

 Comment Written 22-Feb-2017


reply by the author on 23-Feb-2017
    Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Mastery
Excellent
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So, has anderson got eyes for Shana or what is going on besides the obvious?

Hello, Barbara. My, My, How this plot has developed since the beginning. The stolen art has caused more problems, hasn't it?

Good job of writing this, my friend. Blessings, Bob

 Comment Written 21-Feb-2017


reply by the author on 23-Feb-2017
    Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from dweigt
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Excellent! I like how you have shown the police will be of little help, leaving matters to Shana and Drew. Having Drew overhear Shana's explanation for leaving also neatly advances the story.

Nothing to correct that I could see, although this line bothers me a little:
"Well, officers are you going to be able to help the lady?" When I read it aloud, I feel you need some separation after "officers", a comma or possibly even a question mark, making it two questions.

Looking forward to more. Keep writing!

 Comment Written 21-Feb-2017


reply by the author on 23-Feb-2017
    Thank you for the kind review. I agree. I will add a comma.
Comment from Dopeless Hopefiend
Excellent
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Seems that almost more often than not, the police cannot help until what is to be done, is done. A great, engaging read. No game-breaking errors or anything that drew me away from your world while reading. Well done, and I am encouraged to browse previous chapters to know more.

Thanks, and keep writing!

-D.H

 Comment Written 21-Feb-2017


reply by the author on 23-Feb-2017
    Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Margaret Snowdon
Excellent
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It's true even today that police cannot act until something's actually happened. They did question Shana and were satisfied with her answers. A well written chapter with natural speech...

Well penned, Barbara.

Margaret

 Comment Written 21-Feb-2017


reply by the author on 23-Feb-2017
    Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Ric Myworld
Excellent
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I just hope that Anderson doesn't turn out to one of or worse than the bad guys. Although, I'm sure Shana will win him over before her prints are stolen for good. Thanks for another fine chapter. :-)

 Comment Written 21-Feb-2017


reply by the author on 23-Feb-2017
    Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from dejohnsrld (Debbie)
Excellent
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Too often, it is true that the police can do nothing to help until harm is done. So very sad. A well written chapter to your romance story, my friend~Debbie

 Comment Written 21-Feb-2017


reply by the author on 23-Feb-2017
    Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from MelB
Excellent
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This continues to be an intriguing story. A realistic scene with the police asking questions and she seemed to satisfy their curiosity.

 Comment Written 20-Feb-2017


reply by the author on 23-Feb-2017
    Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Mrs Happy Poet
Excellent
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Yes this is well written my friend the story is building up nicely through the chapters I reckon there is going to be lots of twists and turns I enjoyed regards Jill

 Comment Written 20-Feb-2017


reply by the author on 23-Feb-2017
    Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from judiverse
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Do the police ever have questions for Shana. Her story is a complicated one. They even ask her if she was being held against her will. Shana's answers to the police questioning seem to satisfy them. It is a sad fact that suspects often make bail and are out to menace citizens again. Maybe Shana will play it safe and not try to leave the apartment again. Her explanation that she didn't want to cause Anderson to lose custody of his daughter seems to satisfy the police. Very realistic scene and great characterization.

 Comment Written 20-Feb-2017


reply by the author on 20-Feb-2017
    Thank you for your kind review.
reply by judiverse on 20-Feb-2017
    You're very welcome. I love the story. judi