New York's Best: the NYDOE
Viewing comments for Chapter 7 "The NYCDoHD Spells Jobs"A Musical in One Act
30 total reviews
Comment from Sally Law
I am coming in to this wonderful post realizing I am short a six! Dang it, Jay, I don't believe it. I will make it up to you. I've been playing Santa with me ol' six pack of holiday stars!
This is a wonderful end chapter. I am crying at the end though and hoping maybe Zachary is really Mr. Kincaid's son or relationship of some sort. I hate to be this poor because I know it. It's terrible. It brought me to the Lord though for the good book says: "Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven."
I have hopes for both the main characters in the new chapter, especially for Zachary.
Sending you my best today as always and blessings for the New Year to you and yours.
Sal XOs
reply by the author on 29-Dec-2022
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I am coming in to this wonderful post realizing I am short a six! Dang it, Jay, I don't believe it. I will make it up to you. I've been playing Santa with me ol' six pack of holiday stars!
This is a wonderful end chapter. I am crying at the end though and hoping maybe Zachary is really Mr. Kincaid's son or relationship of some sort. I hate to be this poor because I know it. It's terrible. It brought me to the Lord though for the good book says: "Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven."
I have hopes for both the main characters in the new chapter, especially for Zachary.
Sending you my best today as always and blessings for the New Year to you and yours.
Sal XOs
Comment Written 28-Dec-2022
reply by the author on 29-Dec-2022
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A five from you would be a seven from a lot of folks, Sally! I too was intoxicated by the season and gave out all my sixes by Monday evening. Your fine post is still waiting for me to read ... but I will end up hemming and hawing over not having a six there, as well.
Now that the play's over, my hard work begins as I play around with the lyrics and try to come up with something musical!
Jay
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
That was such a good ending, Jay. Had he suddenly come up with a job, it would have ruined it. Begging was obviously all that was left for Zachary. Sometimes you must do what is necessary to survive, and if that's begging, so be it. Zachary will soon learn that, or perish. I wish I could help you as this would really make an excellent musical. There are many places where the background could fade, leaving either Zachary or Mr Kincade to burst into song without the rest of the cast seeing or hearing him. I truly wish you the best of luck with this project, my friend. Let's all hope that next year will be the best. Love and hugs. Sandra xx
reply by the author on 29-Dec-2022
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That was such a good ending, Jay. Had he suddenly come up with a job, it would have ruined it. Begging was obviously all that was left for Zachary. Sometimes you must do what is necessary to survive, and if that's begging, so be it. Zachary will soon learn that, or perish. I wish I could help you as this would really make an excellent musical. There are many places where the background could fade, leaving either Zachary or Mr Kincade to burst into song without the rest of the cast seeing or hearing him. I truly wish you the best of luck with this project, my friend. Let's all hope that next year will be the best. Love and hugs. Sandra xx
Comment Written 28-Dec-2022
reply by the author on 29-Dec-2022
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Oh, Sandra. I'm hugely moved that you came out of your Holiday to read my final scene and say such marvelous things about it. Thank you for being you. Have a blessed New Year, Sandra. Old man love and hugs right back atcha!
Jay
Comment from pome lover
Well, good for ole Zachary! He has principles.
With his imagination, and way with words, he should audition for a part in a play.
Neat ending - unexpected and rather poignant.
Katharine
PS
As he leaves he can be heard singing,
"Next week, a lucky streak-
Another chance to job seek,
I'm on a roll, I must be bold,
Instead of ...oblique!"
reply by the author on 28-Dec-2022
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Well, good for ole Zachary! He has principles.
With his imagination, and way with words, he should audition for a part in a play.
Neat ending - unexpected and rather poignant.
Katharine
PS
As he leaves he can be heard singing,
"Next week, a lucky streak-
Another chance to job seek,
I'm on a roll, I must be bold,
Instead of ...oblique!"
Comment Written 27-Dec-2022
reply by the author on 28-Dec-2022
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I do love the lyric, Katharine. But it would be counterintuitive with the tone of the ending. But I think you're messing with me, LOL. But you do have my mind working toward getting busy with the lyrics. I'm not looking forward to that. I honestly don't know what to do. I'm stuck trying to put music to the lyrical poetry. That means that, assuming some sort of tune manifests, my voice has to sing it into "Audacity" so that all the rises and falls and breaks and elongations that go into music will give some sort of cockamamie direction to a college music department. By the way, I tried emailing Alex Krys, but no response. So I messaged him on Facebook, asking him to check out his email. A case, I believe of over-kill. He probably thinks I'm a scammer. Would he recognize your name? If he would, perhaps you could Facebook message him to let him know I'm legit! Awww, I don't know.
Anyway, I really do like your song. I'm going to add it to your other lyrics. I hate to lose that "oblique"!
Jay
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Jay, I don't know him, nor him, me.
When you first decided to write a musical was the idea that some who wrote lyrics could also write music? And it's turned out that nobody can?
Is there some way you could include all FS members (like an "include all") sort of thing and ask if anyone can write music and would be interested?
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Thank you for thinking of ways I can work it. But I'm kind of jaded. I already wrote two posts and one failed contest for lyricists. They got about 7 or 8 interested lyricists, of which you and two others sent me anything. You were my most prolific and I can't tell you how happy that makes me. But if I wrote something interesting enough to capture the interest of someone who does musical notation, I would have to promote it through the ceiling to capture enough eyes. (I'm finding that none of the Beatles knew how to write musical notation. Nor did Bob Dylan. They jammed with other musicians until it felt right, then made a record.) Musical notation, it appears is a lost art.
As soon as I post part two of my Santa story, that will clear the slate. I plan on spending about a month working on the lyrics you and the few others have provided. I've got to turn them into something hummable at least, then record it myself so that at least the melody is recognizable. And I would have the recording imbedded in the text of the scene.
Nothing but class, eh?
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Well, perhaps you could do like Henry Higgens in My Fair Lady (Rex Harrison) and "talk" the songs, at least, maybe Kincade's. (kind of kidding) though it WAS to music.
Wish I could help, but I'm just a word person.
Good Luck.
Katharine
Comment from prettybluebirds
Your story is different, I will say that for it. It held my attention from the first word to the last. I will watch for more of this story to find out where you are going with it. Nice writing.
reply by the author on 28-Dec-2022
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Your story is different, I will say that for it. It held my attention from the first word to the last. I will watch for more of this story to find out where you are going with it. Nice writing.
Comment Written 27-Dec-2022
reply by the author on 28-Dec-2022
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Too late for that, unless you're into reverse engineering. That was my last scene for the play. Everything led up to this scene's final moment with Zachary leaving the Department of Employment.
Comment from Spitfire
To me this borders on satire and is good for laughs --the bit about begging and not offering to do anything in return for money--because of unions. Poor Zach who is willing to bag eggs, who explains how carefully he would treat them--I think a song is needed there.
reply by the author on 28-Dec-2022
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To me this borders on satire and is good for laughs --the bit about begging and not offering to do anything in return for money--because of unions. Poor Zach who is willing to bag eggs, who explains how carefully he would treat them--I think a song is needed there.
Comment Written 27-Dec-2022
reply by the author on 28-Dec-2022
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That wouldn't be a bad place for a song. But there are so many good places for songs ... but the lyrics I'm getting are not converted into songs yet. And it looks like that will be left to me, sung by my voice into a recorder. This is not how Rogers and Hammerstein did it, I'm sure. Shari, thanks especially for the lovely six stars!
Comment from Jasmine Girl
I'm glad that you have finished it up. While reading this chapter, I couldn't help thinking about Mozart's Magic Flute where a comic character is called "Papagano".
I will go back to read the previous scene. I'm sorry about the conclusion but it's life.
Excellent.
reply by the author on 27-Dec-2022
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I'm glad that you have finished it up. While reading this chapter, I couldn't help thinking about Mozart's Magic Flute where a comic character is called "Papagano".
I will go back to read the previous scene. I'm sorry about the conclusion but it's life.
Excellent.
Comment Written 27-Dec-2022
reply by the author on 27-Dec-2022
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Thank you for reading, Lisa. I'm anxious to get to work on the next phase which is putting music to the lyrics, then the final phase of trying to get a college to stage it. I do appreciate your six stars.
Jay
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It sounds like a real project. Keep me posted.
Comment from Liz O'Neill
A very good question: "ZACHARY:
Will next week put food on tonight's table?" This draws the reader in : "[A long, uncomfortable pause ensues]" A great challenge: "If you ever earn less than that, you keep the amount you earned that day and you do not come back the next. Your job is over." Great insert of a subplot. Oooof
reply by the author on 27-Dec-2022
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A very good question: "ZACHARY:
Will next week put food on tonight's table?" This draws the reader in : "[A long, uncomfortable pause ensues]" A great challenge: "If you ever earn less than that, you keep the amount you earned that day and you do not come back the next. Your job is over." Great insert of a subplot. Oooof
Comment Written 27-Dec-2022
reply by the author on 27-Dec-2022
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Thank you for reading, Liz. This ends it. Now the making it a musical part of it begins.
Comment from barbara.wilkey
I can't wait to see how this turns out. It is incredibly unique and creative. Thank you for sharing this with us. I couldn't see anyway to improve it.
reply by the author on 27-Dec-2022
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I can't wait to see how this turns out. It is incredibly unique and creative. Thank you for sharing this with us. I couldn't see anyway to improve it.
Comment Written 27-Dec-2022
reply by the author on 27-Dec-2022
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There is nothing more to "turn out". It is finished, zapoot! Now my work begins putting music to the lyrics that were volunteered for the play. Thanks for the six lovely stars, Barbara.
Comment from Ulla
Hi Jay, this is an interesting outcome of the story, however sad it may be. Mr Kinkade and Zachary have a lot in common.
I have a sneaking feeling that Mr Kinkade is behind the begging enterprise. But Zachary is too proud to bite.
Your play shows how desperate a time it was during the great depression. I will miss this. Ulla:)))
reply by the author on 27-Dec-2022
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Hi Jay, this is an interesting outcome of the story, however sad it may be. Mr Kinkade and Zachary have a lot in common.
I have a sneaking feeling that Mr Kinkade is behind the begging enterprise. But Zachary is too proud to bite.
Your play shows how desperate a time it was during the great depression. I will miss this. Ulla:)))
Comment Written 27-Dec-2022
reply by the author on 27-Dec-2022
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Thank you so very much for the lovely words and the 6 stars. You were the only one who suggested that Mr. Kincade might be the "wealthy odd duck". Thank you for holding on to that possibility. It's never explained, but certainly could have been a possibility.
Jay
Comment from irishauthorme
You hit the despair and the heartbreak of the Great Depression. Kincade's job would have been exasperating, having very little or nothing to offer people desperate for any job, at any wage. Good description of the setting and the surroundings. The cold, blustery weather certainly added a melancholy touch.
Good work,
irish
reply by the author on 27-Dec-2022
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You hit the despair and the heartbreak of the Great Depression. Kincade's job would have been exasperating, having very little or nothing to offer people desperate for any job, at any wage. Good description of the setting and the surroundings. The cold, blustery weather certainly added a melancholy touch.
Good work,
irish
Comment Written 27-Dec-2022
reply by the author on 27-Dec-2022
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Irish, thank you so much for jumping aboard on this Musical. I have so much left to do with the lyrics that I've been given. Somehow I must get it put into music. You don't know anyone who writes musical notation, do you?
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Sorry, Jay, all the guys I play with are 'play by ear,' we had to learn that way. Us lead players had to be able to play a melody after hearing it just once on stage.