Comment from JudyE

Excellent

Great, descriptive writing of Helen's outfit and it seems the pace is heating up. And I wonder about Rasheed's role in all this. And I'm sorry I don't have any sixes at the moment.

One thought from me:

The police glanced at our passports and waved us through without a second glance. - there are two 'glances' here in quite close proximity.

Have a great day
Judy

 Comment Written 22-Aug-2019

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reply by the author on 22-Aug-2019

I ought to have noticed that! In fact there was another 'second glance' in one of the previous chapters, too. I've changed it to 'without comment'. Glad you enjoyed the descriptive passages in this one. All good wishes, Tony

Comment from Jannypan (Jan)

Excellent

So, the black car is following them because of Hele or Rasheed, or both? Hmm. You did a great job with this chapter, Tony. The casual shopping for clothes that Helen is doing is sharply contrasted with the bombing. Both incidents are written with great imagery. Helen's purchases sound beautiful. The bombs sound terrifying. This chapter is one of the best. Thanks for sharing. Jan

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 Comment Written 22-Aug-2019

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reply by the author on 22-Aug-2019

Thanks, Jan. Glad you enjoyed this one. I really felt as if I was getting into my stride when writing it. I appreciate your kind words. All good wishes, Tony