Perennials of War
Viewing comments for Chapter 21 "Chapter Sieben part eine"Is Anderson a gallant knight? Can he recover Shan
35 total reviews
Comment from Ulla
Hi Barbara, great new chapter and I like the dialogue. It's crisp and to the point. Yeah, it does seem that they are taking on a lot in order to get the picture back. Can't wait to see what is happening next. All the best. Ulla:)))
reply by the author on 26-Mar-2017
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Hi Barbara, great new chapter and I like the dialogue. It's crisp and to the point. Yeah, it does seem that they are taking on a lot in order to get the picture back. Can't wait to see what is happening next. All the best. Ulla:)))
Comment Written 26-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 26-Mar-2017
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Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from kahpot
An excellent read Although I just came in I will find the beginning and catch up thanks a lot for the description of characters I was then able to go back and understand well done****kahpot
reply by the author on 26-Mar-2017
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An excellent read Although I just came in I will find the beginning and catch up thanks a lot for the description of characters I was then able to go back and understand well done****kahpot
Comment Written 26-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 26-Mar-2017
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Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Heidi M
Shana has got to be feeling overwhelmed by all this and frustrated by not knowing the plans they are devising. The lack of control and seeing others put in harm's way would be disconcerting.
One minor suggestion: be a bit more descriptive when Drew 'changes his voice'. Was it raspy, deep, angry, loud, soft, clipped?
reply by the author on 26-Mar-2017
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Shana has got to be feeling overwhelmed by all this and frustrated by not knowing the plans they are devising. The lack of control and seeing others put in harm's way would be disconcerting.
One minor suggestion: be a bit more descriptive when Drew 'changes his voice'. Was it raspy, deep, angry, loud, soft, clipped?
Comment Written 26-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 26-Mar-2017
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Thank you for the kind review. I will work on that. I pictured a silly voice and wasn't sure how to describe it.
Comment from Meia (MESAYERS)
"There are not buts in this," interrupted Anderson. "If we're not careful we could all be in serious danger. That's why I wanted time to consider our options." He took a bite of stir-fry vegetables and chewed before he continued, "Philip, set a meeting with Jeff around 11:00 in the morning." He glanced at Jane. "See if Jeremy can come over for coffee around 2:00. I need to fly to D.C. around 5:00."
"Do you want to drive to the airport or take the helicopter?" asked Philip. This is like a Bond film! I love it! So exciting, I cannot wait to read more you are such a talented writer kindest regards Meia x
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reply by the author on 26-Mar-2017
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"There are not buts in this," interrupted Anderson. "If we're not careful we could all be in serious danger. That's why I wanted time to consider our options." He took a bite of stir-fry vegetables and chewed before he continued, "Philip, set a meeting with Jeff around 11:00 in the morning." He glanced at Jane. "See if Jeremy can come over for coffee around 2:00. I need to fly to D.C. around 5:00."
"Do you want to drive to the airport or take the helicopter?" asked Philip. This is like a Bond film! I love it! So exciting, I cannot wait to read more you are such a talented writer kindest regards Meia x
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Comment Written 26-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 26-Mar-2017
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Thank you for the encouraging review.
Comment from dejohnsrld (Debbie)
give yours back." Smiled Jane.
( give yours back," smiled Jane.)
, "Philip, set a meeting with Jeff around 11:00 in the morning." He glanced at Jane. "See if Jeremy can come over for coffee around 2:00. I need to fly to D.C. around 5:00."
(I would take out a couple of the 'arounds' in this. Well written chapter, my friend~Debbie
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reply by the author on 26-Mar-2017
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give yours back." Smiled Jane.
( give yours back," smiled Jane.)
, "Philip, set a meeting with Jeff around 11:00 in the morning." He glanced at Jane. "See if Jeremy can come over for coffee around 2:00. I need to fly to D.C. around 5:00."
(I would take out a couple of the 'arounds' in this. Well written chapter, my friend~Debbie
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The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 26-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 26-Mar-2017
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Thank you for the kind review. I will get rid of the arounds but the first one is correct.