Perennials of War
Viewing comments for Chapter 8 "Chapter Three part zwei"Is Anderson a gallant knight? Can he recover Shan
33 total reviews
Comment from Sasha
You have clearly done a lot of research for this one. I studied Judaism for many years and found it fascinating. The tension is building and my curiosity is too. Anderson seems to be a bit distant...I wonder why is keeps asking Shana the same questions. He apparently still thinks she is holding something back. I don't think she is.
reply by the author on 26-Dec-2016
  |
You have clearly done a lot of research for this one. I studied Judaism for many years and found it fascinating. The tension is building and my curiosity is too. Anderson seems to be a bit distant...I wonder why is keeps asking Shana the same questions. He apparently still thinks she is holding something back. I don't think she is.
Comment Written 26-Dec-2016
reply by the author on 26-Dec-2016
-
We shall find out if Shana has secrets. Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Ulla
Hi Barbara, things are heating up. They are on to Shana, A few things.
"How did you manage to this" = "How did you manage this"
She told them that had Shana had checked out = that Shana had checked out
"Shh, you don't them to hear you" = "you don't want them to hear you"
Looking forward to more. Happy New Year. All the best. Ulla:)))
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 26-Dec-2016
|
Hi Barbara, things are heating up. They are on to Shana, A few things.
"How did you manage to this" = "How did you manage this"
She told them that had Shana had checked out = that Shana had checked out
"Shh, you don't them to hear you" = "you don't want them to hear you"
Looking forward to more. Happy New Year. All the best. Ulla:)))
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 26-Dec-2016
reply by the author on 26-Dec-2016
-
I changed those three sentences as I was posting and still got them wrong. Thank you for the catch. I appreciate the help.
Comment from robyn corum
Barbara,
This was an interesting chapter, since I am unfamiliar with the Jewish customs. Thanks for sharing all of that. I'm surprised at the number of nits, although I'm not subtracting a star. Please check these out:
1.) When Shana opened it, her eyes widened. "How did you manage to (do?) this?"
2.) y grandpa had promise(d) her family he'd allow her to raise the children
3.) "You don't need (to)."
4.) "(Wait) a minute," said Jane. "It says here,
5.) "We (usually) say a blessing after the meal. I guess with all
6.) Then I accidentally ran into it [on over -- eliminate one] spring break."
7.) Ms. Kohlberg. She told them that had Shana had checked out.
--> please delete the first 'had'
Thanks!
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 26-Dec-2016
|
Barbara,
This was an interesting chapter, since I am unfamiliar with the Jewish customs. Thanks for sharing all of that. I'm surprised at the number of nits, although I'm not subtracting a star. Please check these out:
1.) When Shana opened it, her eyes widened. "How did you manage to (do?) this?"
2.) y grandpa had promise(d) her family he'd allow her to raise the children
3.) "You don't need (to)."
4.) "(Wait) a minute," said Jane. "It says here,
5.) "We (usually) say a blessing after the meal. I guess with all
6.) Then I accidentally ran into it [on over -- eliminate one] spring break."
7.) Ms. Kohlberg. She told them that had Shana had checked out.
--> please delete the first 'had'
Thanks!
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 26-Dec-2016
reply by the author on 26-Dec-2016
-
I had proof read this more times that I usually proof read. WOW!!! What was I reading. I really appreciate the help. I have made ALL of the corrections. I am still sitting her in amazement.
-
Yay! Glad I could help!