Reviews from

Perennials of War

Viewing comments for Chapter 8 "Chapter Three part zwei"
Is Anderson a gallant knight? Can he recover Shan

33 total reviews 
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Excellent! That was really interesting about the Jewish traditions. I enjoyed learning about it. Now, what is it these men are after? There is a definite mystery there. Does, Shana know and keeping it to herself, or is she really in the dark? Whatever is going on, she is in danger and lucky for her, she is with the right people to protect her, not to mention the dogs! Well done, my friend! Hope you had a lovely Christmas. :) Sandra. xxx

 Comment Written 26-Dec-2016


reply by the author on 27-Dec-2016
    Thank you for the encouraging review.
Comment from lancellot
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

This is well written chapter. I do wonder if people who are Jewish would actually go through all the fuss, but I guess these are extra nice folks.

Good chapter.

 Comment Written 26-Dec-2016


reply by the author on 26-Dec-2016
    Actually hardcore Jewish people do go through all of this. I have known some. I have also known some who only go through part of it and some who go through none of it. It depends. Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from mbroyles2
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Extremely well written with a wonderful lesson in Jewish traditions.
I have to admit that I agree with Anderson. I think there is more behind this painting then it being worth millions.
I guess we will see.
Happy new year
Michael

 Comment Written 26-Dec-2016


reply by the author on 26-Dec-2016
    I think you're correct. Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Heidi M
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I loved the way Helen took the phone from Jane (who kept referring to it for the next step) and asked if there was a blessing for it.
You did a good job on Shana's conversations with the dog.
You don't need (to)
"I don't see why not," interrupted (Andrew). Who is Andrew? Anderson? Should it be Drew?
the (Nazis) stealing it
Nice, subtle touch with the gentle kiss between Shana and Drew before the meal

 Comment Written 26-Dec-2016


reply by the author on 26-Dec-2016
    Thank you for the catches. I have made the corrections.
Comment from Mrs Happy Poet
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

This is well written my friend and reads well I like the way you are using the Jewish religion and customs in the chapter it educates readers like myself who only know a little about the Jewish customs I enjoyed regards Jill

 Comment Written 26-Dec-2016


reply by the author on 26-Dec-2016
    Thank you for the encouraging review.
Comment from Ric Myworld
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Thanks for sharing another fine chapter that has me still wondering why the Russians would be the ones chasing Shana around. Great job. :-)

 Comment Written 26-Dec-2016


reply by the author on 26-Dec-2016
    To be honest I am wondering the same thing. LOL Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from c_lucas
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

I like the mystery you are implanting here. This is very well written with a smooth flow of words, making for a very good imagery. Things are starting to pop.

 Comment Written 26-Dec-2016


reply by the author on 26-Dec-2016
    Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from kathleenspalding
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Very interesting chapter! Looks like it will be a good book.

Typos -

...My grandpa had promised (add d)...

Please proceed - go ahead would be more conversational.

...then I accidently ran into it (discovered it?) on (insert noun) over...

...ID indicates...something more conversational.

That's it. Good job.

 Comment Written 26-Dec-2016


reply by the author on 26-Dec-2016
    Hmmmm, I answered this and it's back. Oh my!!! I did make the changes. I appreciate the help.
reply by kathleenspalding on 26-Dec-2016
    Got it this time. :-) Glad you found my review helpful.
Comment from Sis Cat
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I enjoyed and marveled how you illustrated Jewish traditions while keeping your story moved forward. I, too, wonder if there is more to the stolen painting than the painting. I am intrigued.

I found several omissions:

"...manage to (get) this."

"Motioned for him to leave," not "the."

"you don't (want) them to hear you,"

Thank you for sharing your informative, entertaining tale.

 Comment Written 26-Dec-2016


reply by the author on 26-Dec-2016
    Thank you for the catches. I have made the corrections. I guess I was sleeping while I was proof reading.
Comment from davisr (Rhonda)
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I haven't read many of your chapters, so I'm not sure if you bring up the Jewish traditions in them, but it is interesting. I love to learn about cultures I'm not familiar with.
I like the way the others tried to accommodate her beliefs.
I do like the intrigue you've created.

Great job,
Rhonda

 Comment Written 26-Dec-2016


reply by the author on 26-Dec-2016
    Thank you for the kind review. Yes, I have brought up the fact that Shana is Jewish, but just now getting into it. It will be an issue throughout the story.
reply by davisr (Rhonda) on 26-Dec-2016
    I did read on of the other chapters, maybe two, so I knew she was Jewish, but I didn't know about your other books. You are a wonderful writer!
    Rhonda
reply by the author on 26-Dec-2016
    Thank you.