Comment from Write Right Writer

Excellent

Congratulations! It seems that you have accomplished the two-fold objective of 1) conveying a complete story using only six words while 2) not rhyming your words.

Your word choice is strong. 'Ricocheting' connotes movement, 'striking' creates conflict, and 'escape impossible produces drama. I believe this presentation of movement, conflict, and drama qualifies as a complete story. Well done.

Keep up the good work and best of luck in the contest.

Blessings...

WRW (Curt)


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 Comment Written 04-Oct-2019

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reply by the author on 04-Oct-2019

Thank you for such a generous, detailed review. I am very befuddled about what constitutes poety, as it's not just rhymes. I just hope I escaped it here, but you give me hope.

reply by Write Right Writer on 05-Oct-2019

BCE...

You are welcome! It was my pleasure and
I am delighted to have provided you with an encouraging ray of hope.

I agree with you that a firm grasp of poetry is a vast undertaking--the epitome of a commitment to lifelong learning. And it is counterintuitive that fewer and fewer words seem to expand the definition and power of poetry.

As an aside, I am aspiring to become a recognized reviewer on the site. If you believe my review was worthy of your support, I would very much appreciate your nomination. If not, I remain grateful for your reply. Thanks.

reply by the author on 05-Oct-2019

OK so I didn't nominate you because we're in the middle of a blind entry - I have a feeling messages thanks etc wreck that, so I wait till everything's all over... then go back and find you. But it's true your review made my day and had me leaping up and down with glee, but I'm very arkward and consider with only 6 nominations a month, you can only nominate people who teach you something, not just joy. So you need to dig a bit deeper and find some constructive criticism. Your best bet would be to fan me (usually my stuff does need more work, and I take criticism well)

reply by Write Right Writer on 05-Oct-2019

Points well taken on all counts. I can't believe it didn't occur to me that it would be difficult, if not impossible, to nominate me (or anyone else) until after the blindness of the blind entry contest ends.

And your demarcation between leaping for joy and learning to improve your craft makes perfect sense. I often offer more specific critique but the unconventional format and nature of your 6-word story poem left little room for constructive criticism. So, let's just say, "fair enough" and proceed according to the plan you propose. I look forward to reading and reviewing your work and, perhaps someday, earning a reviewer nominate from you, should my comments warrant such a response. Until then, keep up the good work.

Blessings...