The French Letter
Viewing comments for Chapter 15 "Karachi"A Novel
26 total reviews
Comment from estory
The unsettling nature of life jiggles us in our seats in this episode. France and what transpired at Versailles seems like another world now. You have some disconnected points in this story you're going to have to try and stitch together somehow. estory
reply by the author on 01-Oct-2018
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The unsettling nature of life jiggles us in our seats in this episode. France and what transpired at Versailles seems like another world now. You have some disconnected points in this story you're going to have to try and stitch together somehow. estory
Comment Written 01-Oct-2018
reply by the author on 01-Oct-2018
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Yes, there?s quite a bit to bring together now, but I have a plan! LOL 😂
Comment from Mustang Patty
Hi, Tony,
Thank you for sharing this well-written story. The richness of your words truly enhances the lines of the story of international travel and the perils that wait behind every decision.
I will look for the next chapter, and if I have time, go back to see what I missed,
~MP~
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2018
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Hi, Tony,
Thank you for sharing this well-written story. The richness of your words truly enhances the lines of the story of international travel and the perils that wait behind every decision.
I will look for the next chapter, and if I have time, go back to see what I missed,
~MP~
Comment Written 01-Oct-2018
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2018
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Thanks, Patty. I appreciate your review and kind words. Best wishes, Tony
Comment from Ulla
Hi Tony, it's an intriguing story your writing and a fascinating story that Helen is recounting. It's also very well written. I can't wait to see what happened in Bangkok. I really liked the banter about 'the French letter. That put a big smile on my face. I'm really enjoying reading. All the best. Ulla:))
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2018
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Hi Tony, it's an intriguing story your writing and a fascinating story that Helen is recounting. It's also very well written. I can't wait to see what happened in Bangkok. I really liked the banter about 'the French letter. That put a big smile on my face. I'm really enjoying reading. All the best. Ulla:))
Comment Written 01-Oct-2018
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2018
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Very many thanks, Ulla. Two sixes in a row! Wow! I'll have to pull all the stops out for the Bangkok chapter! I have a few ideas I'm toying with - none of them set in cement!
Comment from Jannypan (Jan)
I enjoyed this chapter, Tony. You give readers much info about Helen's early life. Although I liked it, I am feeling like finding the owner of the letter is being pushed aside. However, I believe you will tie it together in the future. Thanks for sharing. Jan
reply by the author on 30-Sep-2018
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I enjoyed this chapter, Tony. You give readers much info about Helen's early life. Although I liked it, I am feeling like finding the owner of the letter is being pushed aside. However, I believe you will tie it together in the future. Thanks for sharing. Jan
Comment Written 30-Sep-2018
reply by the author on 30-Sep-2018
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Yes, Jan, I appreciate your comment. Running the sub-plot concurrently with the main one is causing me problems that I hadn't anticipated. However, there is a connection, as I hope will become apparent in forthcoming chapters.
Comment from lyenochka
Such a scary thing for two young women to even be outside there. I don't know if Pakistan is more tolerant but certainly in Afghanistan, they would need a male chaperone to be out at all. Sunbathing sounds illegal in a country that requires women to cover up all the time. Great job researching the paperwork issues and building up the plot of this background story.
reply by the author on 30-Sep-2018
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Such a scary thing for two young women to even be outside there. I don't know if Pakistan is more tolerant but certainly in Afghanistan, they would need a male chaperone to be out at all. Sunbathing sounds illegal in a country that requires women to cover up all the time. Great job researching the paperwork issues and building up the plot of this background story.
Comment Written 30-Sep-2018
reply by the author on 30-Sep-2018
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Thanks, Helen. I appreciate your supportive comments about the research. Although Clifton Beach is in one of the wealthier and more cosmopolitan suburbs, you are probably right about the sunbathing. I've now amended that part to read: "It was quite a novelty for us to be near water. We enjoyed watching the sun sparkling on the sea, and appreciated the soothing tranquillity of gently lapping waves." All the best, Tony
Comment from Lady Jane
'holiday'. -'holiday.'
Excellent installment. Not sure if I've read the previous chapters so, I may need to go back and see how this all unfolds. Clean writing with excellent detail and dialogue. Pacing was steady and the content was engaging and fresh. I'm hoping the 'nightmares' will be unveiled in upcoming chapters in more detail - and their origin :) Just curious- thanks for sharing.
Janelle
reply by the author on 30-Sep-2018
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'holiday'. -'holiday.'
Excellent installment. Not sure if I've read the previous chapters so, I may need to go back and see how this all unfolds. Clean writing with excellent detail and dialogue. Pacing was steady and the content was engaging and fresh. I'm hoping the 'nightmares' will be unveiled in upcoming chapters in more detail - and their origin :) Just curious- thanks for sharing.
Janelle
Comment Written 30-Sep-2018
reply by the author on 30-Sep-2018
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Thanks, Janelle. Yes, of course some of the nightmares are about the indiscriminate shooting of her parents by the Jihadists, but there is more to come when they reach Bangkok, which may give the plot a kick up the backside and get things moving a bit faster!
Comment from krys123
Cheers, Tony;
> I learned many things about traveling I did not know before and I owe it all to your story. I did not know you needed to have enough money before you could travel, or to get a visa to go there.
>It seems that Charles and Helen are quite a match and they seem to be getting on quite well except for Helen's nightmares. It would be good for her to tell her speak of them to Charles get them out of her system, but they must be quite alarming considering why she's not easily outward about it.
>Thank you so much for sharing this, Tony,And I'll be looking for your next installment.
> Take care and have a good one especially because you just deserve it.
Alx
> PS: I'm learning so much about writing from reading your works and I thank you.
reply by the author on 30-Sep-2018
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Cheers, Tony;
> I learned many things about traveling I did not know before and I owe it all to your story. I did not know you needed to have enough money before you could travel, or to get a visa to go there.
>It seems that Charles and Helen are quite a match and they seem to be getting on quite well except for Helen's nightmares. It would be good for her to tell her speak of them to Charles get them out of her system, but they must be quite alarming considering why she's not easily outward about it.
>Thank you so much for sharing this, Tony,And I'll be looking for your next installment.
> Take care and have a good one especially because you just deserve it.
Alx
> PS: I'm learning so much about writing from reading your works and I thank you.
Comment Written 30-Sep-2018
reply by the author on 30-Sep-2018
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Thanks, Alex. I've never before heard of the requirement to prove sufficient assets for travel, but it seems to be a requirement for Pakistanis entering Thailand - perhaps because of the refugee problem. I'm learning quite a bit as this story progresses! All the best, Tony
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That's quite amazing, Tony, the things we learn when we investigate some simple situations.
I been really liking it and looking forward to your next installment.
Alx
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That's quite amazing, Tony, the things we learn when we investigate some simple situations.
I been really liking it and looking forward to your next installment.
Alx
Comment from barbara.wilkey
You've left a wonderful hook here. I can't wait to find out what happens in Thailand. I do like this story and look forward to the next installment. You're doing a great job writing it.
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2018
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You've left a wonderful hook here. I can't wait to find out what happens in Thailand. I do like this story and look forward to the next installment. You're doing a great job writing it.
Comment Written 30-Sep-2018
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2018
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Very many thanks for your continued support, Barbara - also for the six stars. Glad that you're still enjoying it. All the best, Tony
Comment from Adri7enne
I'm sure you realize that the part of your story where Helen is 'telling' the story is not as compelling as what happens on scene. In order to have Helen and Kayla's story be more direct you'd have to change the form of your novel drastically. You'd have to write from Helen's perspective and from her POV as her story develops. That's the problem with novels. Once you're half way there you have to tow the line, uh? The part where she's with Michael almost seems like the epilogue now. I'm reading along, nonetheless. Write your way out, Tony. It's still interesting.
reply by the author on 01-Oct-2018
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I'm sure you realize that the part of your story where Helen is 'telling' the story is not as compelling as what happens on scene. In order to have Helen and Kayla's story be more direct you'd have to change the form of your novel drastically. You'd have to write from Helen's perspective and from her POV as her story develops. That's the problem with novels. Once you're half way there you have to tow the line, uh? The part where she's with Michael almost seems like the epilogue now. I'm reading along, nonetheless. Write your way out, Tony. It's still interesting.
Comment Written 30-Sep-2018
reply by the author on 01-Oct-2018
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You have it exactly, Adrienne. I've boxed myself into a corner by making the author one of the characters! It considerably restricts the way in which I can deliver the backstory, which is to some extent a parallel plot. I'm hoping that I will be able to extricate myself before too much longer. I just need to get the events in Bangkok out of the way first.
Comment from damommy
Helen is truly a woman of mystery. I feel Charles is being led about by her tales. I know something will pull together her memories and this intriguing envelope Charles has. In the meantime, this good story keeps me guessing. 8-) You certainly know how to keep a reader hooked.
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2018
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Helen is truly a woman of mystery. I feel Charles is being led about by her tales. I know something will pull together her memories and this intriguing envelope Charles has. In the meantime, this good story keeps me guessing. 8-) You certainly know how to keep a reader hooked.
Comment Written 30-Sep-2018
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2018
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Thanks, Yvonne. I'm beginning to find this a bit like juggling with one too many balls in the air! LOL
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You're doing it well.