Perennials of War
Viewing comments for Chapter 96 "Chapter Neunundzwanzig Part zwei"Is Anderson a gallant knight? Can he recover Shan
20 total reviews
Comment from Phyllis Stewart
Good job showing Shana's mixed emotions. She wants to thank Drew for all he's doing, yet she wants to remain independent and capable of looking out for herself. Also, to let a man give you money is troubling and can be taken the wrong way, but Drew doesn't realize that.
reply by the author on 24-Sep-2018
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Good job showing Shana's mixed emotions. She wants to thank Drew for all he's doing, yet she wants to remain independent and capable of looking out for herself. Also, to let a man give you money is troubling and can be taken the wrong way, but Drew doesn't realize that.
Comment Written 24-Sep-2018
reply by the author on 24-Sep-2018
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For being so smart and worldly, Drew is sometimes clueless. He's a male and can't help. LOL Thank you for the kind review.
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I don't think there's ever been a man who understands a woman... and vice versa. :)
Comment from Sis Cat
Amazing. I keep rooting for this couple to make things work out but Anderson's money and good intentions get in the way. That's a good thing because it creates tension and drama, and Shana let it be known that she can't be bought off:
"The instruction manual. You don't need it, because you don't need to finish the bed. I have Romeo. You're services aren't needed."
One of my favorite scenes in this chapter was when Shana was talking aloud to Romeo and herself about all the things Anderson did for her. I found this line hilarious:
He's killed people to keep me safe. That's worth a couple of fingers.
Ha.
Although she did go to bed without settling the argument first, the morning will bring a new chapter in this romantic drama.
Thank you for sharing.
reply by the author on 24-Sep-2018
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Amazing. I keep rooting for this couple to make things work out but Anderson's money and good intentions get in the way. That's a good thing because it creates tension and drama, and Shana let it be known that she can't be bought off:
"The instruction manual. You don't need it, because you don't need to finish the bed. I have Romeo. You're services aren't needed."
One of my favorite scenes in this chapter was when Shana was talking aloud to Romeo and herself about all the things Anderson did for her. I found this line hilarious:
He's killed people to keep me safe. That's worth a couple of fingers.
Ha.
Although she did go to bed without settling the argument first, the morning will bring a new chapter in this romantic drama.
Thank you for sharing.
Comment Written 23-Sep-2018
reply by the author on 24-Sep-2018
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Thank you for the kind review. Your reviews always make me smile.
Comment from c_lucas
The modern woman is hesitant to give up her independence. This is very well written with a smooth flow of words, making for a very interesting read. There is good imagery.
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2018
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The modern woman is hesitant to give up her independence. This is very well written with a smooth flow of words, making for a very interesting read. There is good imagery.
Comment Written 23-Sep-2018
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2018
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Thank you for the kind review.
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You're welcome.
Comment from Adri7enne
Shana is going through an agony of uncertainty with Anderson wanting to rescue her. She's a proud young woman and she can't help feeling resentful at the high-handed manner in which he attempts to pay her way. On the one hand she's grateful for his help, but she hates feeling so vulnerable.
Picking up the pillow and hugging it, she said, "Thank you." She leaned her head against the bed frame.( "I should be thanking him for everything he's done that he didn't need to do.") She held up one finger. "He's gone out of his way to keep me safe," second finger rose, "and has helped get my painting back." Third finger up. "I have no clue how many fingers I need to raise for the help he gave Hannah, Paul, and Sarah. He's killed people to keep me safe. That's worth a couple of fingers. Also he kept his promise to me and he's never made any advances toward me."
Do you really think she would have this conversation with herself out loud? You don't think she'd feel awkward about speaking to herself out loud like this? Perhaps you might consider all of this as inner thoughts?
Shana lay down in bed. "But all of that doesn't negate the fact that he can't buy me. I'm not Patricia." She cried. "That was a cheap shot. Jane said Patricia went after him because of his money and prestige. I don't care about his money or that he's a big man in New York. I could care less. Why am I hurting so badly?"
Shana lay in bed. He can't buy me, she thought. I'm not Patricia. Just because she was impressed with his money and prestige doesn't mean I am. So why am I hurting so badly?
It would simplify her inner musings and still show her outrage. Just something to consider, Barb. Disregard it if you prefer to have her speak out loud with quotes.
Good work. Interesting characters. I'm enjoying the story.
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reply by the author on 23-Sep-2018
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Shana is going through an agony of uncertainty with Anderson wanting to rescue her. She's a proud young woman and she can't help feeling resentful at the high-handed manner in which he attempts to pay her way. On the one hand she's grateful for his help, but she hates feeling so vulnerable.
Picking up the pillow and hugging it, she said, "Thank you." She leaned her head against the bed frame.( "I should be thanking him for everything he's done that he didn't need to do.") She held up one finger. "He's gone out of his way to keep me safe," second finger rose, "and has helped get my painting back." Third finger up. "I have no clue how many fingers I need to raise for the help he gave Hannah, Paul, and Sarah. He's killed people to keep me safe. That's worth a couple of fingers. Also he kept his promise to me and he's never made any advances toward me."
Do you really think she would have this conversation with herself out loud? You don't think she'd feel awkward about speaking to herself out loud like this? Perhaps you might consider all of this as inner thoughts?
Shana lay down in bed. "But all of that doesn't negate the fact that he can't buy me. I'm not Patricia." She cried. "That was a cheap shot. Jane said Patricia went after him because of his money and prestige. I don't care about his money or that he's a big man in New York. I could care less. Why am I hurting so badly?"
Shana lay in bed. He can't buy me, she thought. I'm not Patricia. Just because she was impressed with his money and prestige doesn't mean I am. So why am I hurting so badly?
It would simplify her inner musings and still show her outrage. Just something to consider, Barb. Disregard it if you prefer to have her speak out loud with quotes.
Good work. Interesting characters. I'm enjoying the story.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 23-Sep-2018
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2018
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I would have put it as inner thoughts, but one of my editors who published my first book that inner thoughts in italics doesn't convert over to e-books well so I should use them sparingly. That's my reasoning. Thank you for the kind review.
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You don't have to do it italics. Lots of books have inner thoughts without italics. It's just here on Fanstory that some reviewers prefer it. I never use italics for inner thoughts. But again, it's your decision and I'm fine with it. I won't mention it again,
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According to writing rules inner thought should be in italics.
Comment from Gert sherwood
Hello Barb
Shana has to do more than take a shower, to me
she seriously has to take time to realize
(as you said she did take time an counted all the danger he protected her from.)
Shana is so right when she asked herself, "Why am I hurting so bad"
Gert
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2018
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Hello Barb
Shana has to do more than take a shower, to me
she seriously has to take time to realize
(as you said she did take time an counted all the danger he protected her from.)
Shana is so right when she asked herself, "Why am I hurting so bad"
Gert
Comment Written 23-Sep-2018
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2018
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It seems Shana has a lot to think about. I sure hope she does. Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from judiverse
"Lovin' You against my Will" sounds right to describe Shana's situation. His depositing money in her account is another reason for her to make a case against him. It wasn't a smart move on his part, but she was wrong to think he was trying to buy her love. The amount probably didn't seem like much at all to him. I like that she does think of the good things he has done for her and her family. Excellent six star chapter. judi
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2018
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"Lovin' You against my Will" sounds right to describe Shana's situation. His depositing money in her account is another reason for her to make a case against him. It wasn't a smart move on his part, but she was wrong to think he was trying to buy her love. The amount probably didn't seem like much at all to him. I like that she does think of the good things he has done for her and her family. Excellent six star chapter. judi
Comment Written 23-Sep-2018
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2018
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Thank you for the kind review. For Drew that amount was small change. For Shana it was about a half a years income.
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You're very welcome. It's really coming together. If Shana can just get over her stumbling blocks. judi
Comment from Ben Colder
Well, you spent some time on this one. Shanna acted as a typical woman, no offense. lol. The good part is making up and that should be interesting. Well done Barb.
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2018
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Well, you spent some time on this one. Shanna acted as a typical woman, no offense. lol. The good part is making up and that should be interesting. Well done Barb.
Comment Written 23-Sep-2018
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2018
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I hope it will be. I think Shana is beginning to realize her feeling for Drew. LOL Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Sankey
Good old short sad fact-finding chapter. Now only one main spag offering some choices here. Either You're used to getting [his](your own) way."
OR
You're(He's) used to getting his (own)way."
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reply by the author on 23-Sep-2018
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Good old short sad fact-finding chapter. Now only one main spag offering some choices here. Either You're used to getting [his](your own) way."
OR
You're(He's) used to getting his (own)way."
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 23-Sep-2018
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2018
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I have taken care of that. Thank you for your kind review.
Comment from Ulla
Hi Barbara, I liked this chapter. It really shows how much they care for each other and how they go wrong about things. But Shana, I think,is slowly coming around.
Anderson stood and stared in the direction had she left. = ... she had left
You're used to getting his way." = ... getting your way."
All the best. Ulla:)))
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2018
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Hi Barbara, I liked this chapter. It really shows how much they care for each other and how they go wrong about things. But Shana, I think,is slowly coming around.
Anderson stood and stared in the direction had she left. = ... she had left
You're used to getting his way." = ... getting your way."
All the best. Ulla:)))
Comment Written 23-Sep-2018
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2018
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I made those corrections. Thank you for the catches I appreciate the help.
Comment from royowen
Good question, "why is she hurting so badly?" . Perhaps she's in love. Poor Drew. He's a man in big trouble, she counts all the pluses, and she'll realise he just simply wants her. Men can be idiots can't they? Beautifully written again Barbara, blessings, Roy
Typo : You're used to getting (his) way. Your?
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2018
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Good question, "why is she hurting so badly?" . Perhaps she's in love. Poor Drew. He's a man in big trouble, she counts all the pluses, and she'll realise he just simply wants her. Men can be idiots can't they? Beautifully written again Barbara, blessings, Roy
Typo : You're used to getting (his) way. Your?
Comment Written 23-Sep-2018
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2018
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Thank you for the kind review. My husband and were just having that talk a few nights ago. The one about it's amazing any males grow up to adulthood with all the stupid stunts they did as children and especially teenagers. LOL Thank you for the kind review.
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That's true Barbara