Perennials of War
Viewing comments for Chapter 78 "Chapter Vierundzwanzig Part eins"Is Anderson a gallant knight? Can he recover Shan
28 total reviews
Comment from Rasmine
Hello, Barbara, :)
Good chapter. I can hear the snapping of the beans. I did that when I like in Coventry. My aunt was a good cook (not that great a caregiver, though).
Take care,
Nome
reply by the author on 26-May-2018
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Hello, Barbara, :)
Good chapter. I can hear the snapping of the beans. I did that when I like in Coventry. My aunt was a good cook (not that great a caregiver, though).
Take care,
Nome
Comment Written 21-May-2018
reply by the author on 26-May-2018
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Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
That was an excellent chat between Shana and Susan. Now we know that Shana does love Anderson, and we already knew he loved her. Now to get the painting issue out the way and then get Shana's father to give her his blessing to marry the man she loves. Well done, Barbara! :)) Sandra xxx
reply by the author on 26-May-2018
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That was an excellent chat between Shana and Susan. Now we know that Shana does love Anderson, and we already knew he loved her. Now to get the painting issue out the way and then get Shana's father to give her his blessing to marry the man she loves. Well done, Barbara! :)) Sandra xxx
Comment Written 21-May-2018
reply by the author on 26-May-2018
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Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from rtobaygo
Good morning, Barbara
Enjoyed the continuation. So we have the talk -- between Anderson's mother and Shana, which was spot on; his mother's questions going right at the heart of the matter of what Andersen (Drew) means to her (Shana).
Seeing the name Drew in the conversation, I kinda figured he and Anderson were one and the same.
Chapter Vierundzwanzig Part eins. try saying this ten times fast
Take care and stay safe,
Ray
reply by the author on 26-May-2018
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Good morning, Barbara
Enjoyed the continuation. So we have the talk -- between Anderson's mother and Shana, which was spot on; his mother's questions going right at the heart of the matter of what Andersen (Drew) means to her (Shana).
Seeing the name Drew in the conversation, I kinda figured he and Anderson were one and the same.
Chapter Vierundzwanzig Part eins. try saying this ten times fast
Take care and stay safe,
Ray
Comment Written 21-May-2018
reply by the author on 26-May-2018
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Thank you for the kind review. Yes Anderson and Drew are the same person.
Comment from meeshu
well written Barbara. this is a good story, part international intrigue and part spun wisdom. for me , my memories are of shucking corn on the porch.......meeshu
reply by the author on 26-May-2018
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well written Barbara. this is a good story, part international intrigue and part spun wisdom. for me , my memories are of shucking corn on the porch.......meeshu
Comment Written 21-May-2018
reply by the author on 26-May-2018
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Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from apky
I think it is a brilliant idea of yours to set the first private scene with Susan and Shana out on the porch snapping beans. It makes the conversation between the two women less formal and the atmosphere rather cosy.
The whole chapter shows tremendous improvement in your writing, particularly in your dialogue which are no longer silted but ALIVE because of the added coments.
"I didn't think those boundaries mattered anymore." ~ I completely agree with Susan. For a young woman who is a teacher (and not recently arrived from a kibbutz) who lived in New York, Shana's prim-and-proper entrapments come across as acted as well as dated instead of appearing as her own genuine convictions, to the reader.
Great improvement. I'm sorry I gave all my sixes away alread yesterday, Sunday, when I take the time to review the dozens of posts waiting in my inbox. Next time I hope to remember to save one for you. This is the best chapter I've read from you so far, I think.
reply by the author on 26-May-2018
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I think it is a brilliant idea of yours to set the first private scene with Susan and Shana out on the porch snapping beans. It makes the conversation between the two women less formal and the atmosphere rather cosy.
The whole chapter shows tremendous improvement in your writing, particularly in your dialogue which are no longer silted but ALIVE because of the added coments.
"I didn't think those boundaries mattered anymore." ~ I completely agree with Susan. For a young woman who is a teacher (and not recently arrived from a kibbutz) who lived in New York, Shana's prim-and-proper entrapments come across as acted as well as dated instead of appearing as her own genuine convictions, to the reader.
Great improvement. I'm sorry I gave all my sixes away alread yesterday, Sunday, when I take the time to review the dozens of posts waiting in my inbox. Next time I hope to remember to save one for you. This is the best chapter I've read from you so far, I think.
Comment Written 21-May-2018
reply by the author on 26-May-2018
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Shana grew up and teaches in a Peoria Illinois. Not in New York City, she was only there to visit. The community, was a small very old fashioned Jewish community.
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That explains a few more things for me - thanks for enlightening me, Barbara.
Comment from Realist101
More memories of being little flooding back reading this Barb! We shucked corn, snapped beans, put up tomatoes and peaches too. We didn't eat any processed food. And I always admire your skill with dialogue! VERY good. I hope this will publish for you soon too. Best in all things Miss Barbara! Susan
reply by the author on 26-May-2018
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More memories of being little flooding back reading this Barb! We shucked corn, snapped beans, put up tomatoes and peaches too. We didn't eat any processed food. And I always admire your skill with dialogue! VERY good. I hope this will publish for you soon too. Best in all things Miss Barbara! Susan
Comment Written 21-May-2018
reply by the author on 26-May-2018
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Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from redrocklover
I'm new to your story, but I enjoyed this excerpt enough to continue reading in the future. Dialogue flowed smoothly and felt very natural. Keep up the good work.
reply by the author on 26-May-2018
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I'm new to your story, but I enjoyed this excerpt enough to continue reading in the future. Dialogue flowed smoothly and felt very natural. Keep up the good work.
Comment Written 21-May-2018
reply by the author on 26-May-2018
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Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Alexander Vasa
Hello, good continuation of the narrative. I did notice you use 'grinned' a couple of times in quick succession right at the beginning. Maybe edit one out. I always like your engaging style, you paint a good picture with words. And your author notes are to be commended, as they fill us in even more. Parents freak out more if the son doesn't marry in, as it is a maternal line. Not a paternal one. Although Christ went back to David on both of his lines. If the son marries out the kinder are technically not Jewish, but if the girl marries out, the children are still Jewish. LOL, The pickiest people in the World. God loves them, and even he said they were stiffnecked, hahaha Ouch, my neck is hurting, LOL Isn't it interesting that at the time the Bible was in progress, no one knew of the mighty mitochondria and most other cultures were 'who's your father', LOL, But, Jewish women could inherit, and it was 'who's your mother'. You are more your mother's child.
Good story, I always like it when I read your stories, cheers, Ana.
reply by the author on 26-May-2018
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Hello, good continuation of the narrative. I did notice you use 'grinned' a couple of times in quick succession right at the beginning. Maybe edit one out. I always like your engaging style, you paint a good picture with words. And your author notes are to be commended, as they fill us in even more. Parents freak out more if the son doesn't marry in, as it is a maternal line. Not a paternal one. Although Christ went back to David on both of his lines. If the son marries out the kinder are technically not Jewish, but if the girl marries out, the children are still Jewish. LOL, The pickiest people in the World. God loves them, and even he said they were stiffnecked, hahaha Ouch, my neck is hurting, LOL Isn't it interesting that at the time the Bible was in progress, no one knew of the mighty mitochondria and most other cultures were 'who's your father', LOL, But, Jewish women could inherit, and it was 'who's your mother'. You are more your mother's child.
Good story, I always like it when I read your stories, cheers, Ana.
Comment Written 20-May-2018
reply by the author on 26-May-2018
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Thank you for the kind review. I will check out those 'grinned.'
Comment from Phyllis Stewart
Awww... too short. I want Susan to convince Shana that religion doesn't matter. Drew won't care how he raises any kids they have. Of course, Emily would probably stay with the church she is used to. Shana should at least ASK her dad about it.
reply by the author on 26-May-2018
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Awww... too short. I want Susan to convince Shana that religion doesn't matter. Drew won't care how he raises any kids they have. Of course, Emily would probably stay with the church she is used to. Shana should at least ASK her dad about it.
Comment Written 20-May-2018
reply by the author on 26-May-2018
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This is the fourth time I have answered this review. I really do appreciate it. For some reason it won't save it.
Comment from kiwijenny
Isn't it easier conversing over a chore like snapping beans, I have memories of doing that too. This was a very great way to handle this conversation. It anchored it beautifully and made it more real, precious..
God bless
reply by the author on 20-May-2018
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Isn't it easier conversing over a chore like snapping beans, I have memories of doing that too. This was a very great way to handle this conversation. It anchored it beautifully and made it more real, precious..
God bless
Comment Written 20-May-2018
reply by the author on 20-May-2018
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Thank you for the kind review. I attempt to make my writing real.