The Incomparable Fanny Barnwarmer
Viewing comments for Chapter 10 "Incomparable Fanny Barnwarmer 10"America's First Female Comic
28 total reviews
Comment from amahra
Hey, this was a short one, Jay, or did I get so caught up that I read too fast? lol! That kangaroo court was realistic and typical of trials for "Negros" back in Fanny's day. Good job. Also below, I like Fanny's responses that interrupt the reporter. It's how natural speech should be.
But thet ain't gonna stop ya ....
Get on with it.
reply by the author on 23-May-2022
  |
Hey, this was a short one, Jay, or did I get so caught up that I read too fast? lol! That kangaroo court was realistic and typical of trials for "Negros" back in Fanny's day. Good job. Also below, I like Fanny's responses that interrupt the reporter. It's how natural speech should be.
But thet ain't gonna stop ya ....
Get on with it.
Comment Written 23-May-2022
reply by the author on 23-May-2022
-
Ah, Amahra, its so very good to have you stop by. Your delivery of a six is lovely, but your words are over the top. Fanny likes to flex her impatience, but she's got a persistent listener with Robert. You'll get to hear more of the Judge's actual words next time, unfiltered by Fanny's dialect, thanks to an editorial written by a news reporter who was at the trial. I hope you tune in!
Thank you, Amahra!
Comment from royowen
So our dear reporter has pointed out the useless retelling and writing of Fanny's testimony because she was so young, and yet I think nothing's more reliable than the telling of a child. Beautifully written Jay, blessings Roy
reply by the author on 23-May-2022
 |
So our dear reporter has pointed out the useless retelling and writing of Fanny's testimony because she was so young, and yet I think nothing's more reliable than the telling of a child. Beautifully written Jay, blessings Roy
Comment Written 23-May-2022
reply by the author on 23-May-2022
-
I'm relieved to see you weighing in, Roy. I've been talking to others in DM and the consensus of opinion is that it's like hens teeth to get reviews this week. I'm getting about half of what I usually get by this time. You are a gentleman. Thanks Roy.
-
It?s not a good year Jay
-
I'm sorry, Roy. Are you having challenges? Or are you speaking about the contents of the play?
-
Speaking about the play, Jay,
Comment from barbara.wilkey
I'm struggling believing this and I know things like this happened in our history. Thank you for sharing this with us. I really like this story. Good job.
reply by the author on 23-May-2022
|
I'm struggling believing this and I know things like this happened in our history. Thank you for sharing this with us. I really like this story. Good job.
Comment Written 23-May-2022
reply by the author on 23-May-2022
-
It was a time when unbelievable things were happening. In fiction we often have to dial back on reality if we want credibility.
Comment from Katherine M. (k-11)
You dealt a real couple of blows to the gut here. You threw them swiftly and without respite, then left us to hang on for a week, waiting to see whether the bruising will start to heal, or whether we'll be hit again. The system's cruel. Kate xx
reply by the author on 23-May-2022
|
You dealt a real couple of blows to the gut here. You threw them swiftly and without respite, then left us to hang on for a week, waiting to see whether the bruising will start to heal, or whether we'll be hit again. The system's cruel. Kate xx
Comment Written 23-May-2022
reply by the author on 23-May-2022
-
Haha, Katherine, you are a hoot! Thank you so much for reading this and for the six stars. What's the good of having a bruise if it isn't pushed now and again?
-
I figure when you rate 6 stars you can have fun with the review. FS doesn't agree, but to me the rating says everything you think about the script. No need for blah, blah.
Comment from K.L. Rockquemore
I enjoyed reading another scene. I hope my reviews don't sound redundant, but this scene as with the others I have read, is well written, composed and presented. I love the authentic dialogue, it gives so much texture to your writing and ultimately the story.
reply by the author on 23-May-2022
|
I enjoyed reading another scene. I hope my reviews don't sound redundant, but this scene as with the others I have read, is well written, composed and presented. I love the authentic dialogue, it gives so much texture to your writing and ultimately the story.
Comment Written 23-May-2022
reply by the author on 23-May-2022
-
Thank you, K.L. for your kind words. Your presence in the audience means a lot to me. There are probably three more scenes to the final curtain. I'll try to keep them lively for you.
Comment from lyenochka
That's so sad. But you do shed some light on the unjust trials of this nation's history (and probably all countries have this situation.) Seems like the judge was either involved or related to the guilty party.
I would think the reporter has a good book to write - or maybe a script...
reply by the author on 23-May-2022
|
That's so sad. But you do shed some light on the unjust trials of this nation's history (and probably all countries have this situation.) Seems like the judge was either involved or related to the guilty party.
I would think the reporter has a good book to write - or maybe a script...
Comment Written 23-May-2022
reply by the author on 23-May-2022
-
Thank you for reading this, Helen. It was one of the most volatile times in American History with the Civil War just ramping up. The judge and his decision will be highlighted more next chapter and the reader won't have to rely on Fanny's description. Hope to see you.
Comment from T B Botts
Hello Jay,
I guess I must be a masochist because I missed chapter nine last time around so I read both nine and ten today. Exceptional writing! Great story. You really know how to grab the reader's attention. Well done.
Have a blessed evening.
Tom
reply by the author on 22-May-2022
|
Hello Jay,
I guess I must be a masochist because I missed chapter nine last time around so I read both nine and ten today. Exceptional writing! Great story. You really know how to grab the reader's attention. Well done.
Have a blessed evening.
Tom
Comment Written 22-May-2022
reply by the author on 22-May-2022
-
Thank you so much, Tom. I was already blown away by your sixth star, but to tell me you also went back to review chapter nine! That really means a lot to me. Be blessed!
Comment from Gert sherwood
Jay your chapter In pursuit of Caleb Barnwarmer
The Incomparable Fanny.
I had to smile when the Reporter said to Fanny
having talked with you, having seen your act, having been in every way totally charmed by the incomparable Fanny Barnwarmer--
I can not believe Fanny was putting on an act
and oh about believing that Fanny when she was fourteen;
would believe what Fanny could remember what took place; is wrong here I'm 85 and Remember when I was that age can clearly vision what happened.
You know about us older; folks, cannot recall what happened a week ago.
Gert
reply by the author on 22-May-2022
|
Jay your chapter In pursuit of Caleb Barnwarmer
The Incomparable Fanny.
I had to smile when the Reporter said to Fanny
having talked with you, having seen your act, having been in every way totally charmed by the incomparable Fanny Barnwarmer--
I can not believe Fanny was putting on an act
and oh about believing that Fanny when she was fourteen;
would believe what Fanny could remember what took place; is wrong here I'm 85 and Remember when I was that age can clearly vision what happened.
You know about us older; folks, cannot recall what happened a week ago.
Gert
Comment Written 22-May-2022
reply by the author on 22-May-2022
-
Hahaha ... You're funny, Gert! I know what you mean about your memory and mine. Not every octogenarian can say that, though. I'm so grateful that you are reading my play and enjoying it.
Comment from nomi338
This as amazing a development as the one related by Miss Fanny. The testimony of a fourteen year old can be as trustworthy of an adult, especially at a time when fourteen year old girls could be married off. This is no doubt a surprising development.
reply by the author on 22-May-2022
|
This as amazing a development as the one related by Miss Fanny. The testimony of a fourteen year old can be as trustworthy of an adult, especially at a time when fourteen year old girls could be married off. This is no doubt a surprising development.
Comment Written 22-May-2022
reply by the author on 22-May-2022
-
While it is true that 14 year old girls in the 1860s were married off at 14, the reporter is worried about the believability of a 14 year-old Fanny in 1929, when he would be publishing his story. I'm so happy you are finding relevance in this play, Nolan. There are some unexpected twists in the next couple of scenes I hope you are around to see.
-
If I am still alive I will be here for whatever happens, count on that.
-
And I have full faith in your longevity, Nolan!
-
Thank you.
-
BTW, I love your new bio picture!
-
Thank you, I was much younger then, It was at my son's high school graduation, the year was 1991.
-
Nooooo, you don't look any thirty-one years older now than in '91. You are dapper and charming in both.
-
They say black don't crack, but I don't know. anyway thanks for the compliment, I am now 79 years young.
-
Well, there must me something to it, because this face sure does crack. I'm soon to be 83.
Comment from LJbutterfly
This script has more twists and turns than Lombard Street in San Francisco. Also, you've done some pretty impressive spelling in order to capture Miss Fanny's 1929 Texas dialect. I had to read a couple of words twice and had to smile when I got it. It's amazing how much drama you've built into two people talking. I will see you after intermission.
reply by the author on 22-May-2022
|
This script has more twists and turns than Lombard Street in San Francisco. Also, you've done some pretty impressive spelling in order to capture Miss Fanny's 1929 Texas dialect. I had to read a couple of words twice and had to smile when I got it. It's amazing how much drama you've built into two people talking. I will see you after intermission.
Comment Written 22-May-2022
reply by the author on 22-May-2022
-
You just don't know how great your review makes me feel ... especially when this scene is slow at gathering reviews. Expect more turns in the next scene. It's getting close to a wrap.